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ambiguity

its early
ambiguously early
birds are calling
so i can tell its the morning
but the sun is yet to wake up
as are you,
it's dark but i know you're there
your warmth radiates into me
unrelentingly
but i'm grateful for it
my eyes closed for a second
yet hours passed
it's quiet
a nice quiet
the backdrop of unwavering safety
to just sleep
with arms weaved together
and fingers interlocked,
and if knew this was the last time
for a long time
i would have held on a little tighter
and kept you a little closer
enjoying the ambiguity
and the certainty
that you were here right now
at this in-between hour
where time doesn't exist
because at this moment
neither of us know
that after the sun rises
and sets again
everything will happen
and we'll end up counting seconds
and kisses
and squeezing hands
breaking down
and calming down
until everything becomes quiet again
except this time i'm not grateful for it
and everything is ambiguous again
except i'm not enjoying it
and i cannot stop wishing that we had one more night
so i could have held you a little tighter
and kept you a little closer
and stayed awake
to try and beat the sun
before she takes you from me
indefinitely
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